The Rose
by Amaya Redfern
Summary: Alistair finding that rose we all love so much.  My character Zaira is his object of affection.      Very short, may contain more one-shots later. Updated with a Cullen story!
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: To keep you guys occupied lol. I thought this would be adorable. =D**

**I do not own Dragon Age: Origins or any of the companies associated with it.**

Alistair couldn't believe how many miserable refugees there were in Lothering. He'd heard the stories of course, about what a Blight could do to the land, but he'd never imagined this…so much despair.

He trailed lightly behind Zaira and Morrigan, having more of an excuse to be silent now. His 2 day fog of sadness was lifted, but still clung to the edges of his mind. He wasn't sure it would ever leave.

Glancing around himself, he suddenly felt a little shallow. He at least, had a purpose, somewhere to go, a friend to rely on. These people had nothing, no one. No home, no money, no family even, for some of them. A sigh escaped him. The Blight was a horrible thing. It attacked everything, sometimes without even the darkspawn's taint. All of Ferelden felt the pain.

Something to the left caught his eye. Checking to see that Zaira was talking to a young child by the bridge, he bent down to examine his finding. A rose. The garden it rested in was abandoned, gnarled and twisted…but the rose still bloomed, a perfect flower, rich in it's red coloring. Unable to help himself, Alistair reached forward and took it from what would have been it's gravesite. In just a few days the darkspawn would reach this place…he couldn't let something so perfect and beautiful be destroyed along with everything else.

Hearing laughter from his companion's direction he swiveled his head back to the right, to see Zaira smiling at something Morrigan had said. This happened to bring the rose into his vision as well, and a comparison of the two formed in his head.

They were the same.

Zaira laughing and smiling was a beautiful thing, as precious as the rose he held now.

Turning back slowly with a surprised expression on his face, he gazed at the flower in wonder, and began gently tucking it into a small box. Such a strange thing to realize in a place such as this. Zaira was…something to be protected and cared for. She had her own thorns, that much was sure – he'd never seen anyone fight quite the way she did. But she was still a creature worthy of so much more than what she had…and he wanted to give it to her. Anything she wanted.

"Alistair?" Alistair looked up from placing the box in his back at Zaira's call. "Are you ready? I want to get moving soon."

He was silent for a moment before a slightly amused smile came across his face, unseen even by her. Rising, he responded:

"Your desire is my command."

**A/N: Lol, this so wouldn't happen. I know he doesn't say that line for quite a while but still. I **_**still**_** keep imagining him looking over my shoulder going "Erase that! **_**This**_** is what really happened."**

**A short one shot not really worth your time lol. I might add more one-shots into this as they pop into my mind.**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I didn't really plan to write this. But I think it's kinda sweet. Sheds some more light on Zaira's past as well. =)**

**I do not own any of the games in the Dragon Age series or any of the companies associated with them.**

Destruction

He was barely a boy when she arrived.

Cullen's father was a templar, and since his son was so interested in the profession, he'd gotten permission to bring him to the Circle Tower once – under close watch of course. Cullen was well behaved though. They had no reason to worry.

It was just a coincidence that she was left there that day. Or maybe it wasn't. It didn't matter, he'd never know.

He didn't remember much of how it happened. All he knew was that one moment he was walking quietly through the corridors with his father, and the next people were running through the hallways, speaking in hushed urgent tones, creating a nervous atmosphere. Just as he was about to ask his father what was going on, Irving appeared, and the two spoke in the same worried voices. A minute later, they were going back down the corridor at a quick pace.

"What's happening, father?" he finally got to ask.

"A mage was dropped off," the man answered gruffly. "Not by the templars. And it's just a baby."

"That's bad?"

"Not many children show signs of magic that young, Cullen. And if they do, it…doesn't usually turn out well."

At the time, the young boy had no idea what he'd meant.

They reached the front entrance of the tower, where the boatmaster stood arguing with the First Enchanter and Knight Commander.

"Damn it man, how could you let the woman go without getting her name?"

"This could cause many problems in the future."

"What was I supposed to do? We've never had one just dropped off before!"

"We've _told_ you what to do in those situations…!"

Cullen just happened to be positioned near the man's pocket at this point, and due to his small height, he easily heard a distinct jingling. He only realized much later that the man had been paid off.

Curious, the boy looked around to see the new mage, and spotted an older one holding a basket and smiling at something inside. She glanced up and beckoned him with a soft smile. Cullen looked to his father for permission.

The man glanced at the woman then nodded to Cullen. The small boy ran clumsily over and peered eagerly into the small basket.

Inside was a small box, a card with a name, and the sleeping baby, wrapped in a thick black blanket. The few curls on her head were a very light shade, of what color he couldn't be sure. And she had odd markings on her face, which he could only see if the light was at the right angle.

As he watched the infant, her eyes began to flicker open.

"Uh oh," the mage said. "I hope she doesn't get upset."

The baby's eyes opened and locked on Cullen's. She smiled and laughed.

"Look!" the woman chuckled. "She likes you."

Cullen hesitated a moment, then smiled at the young mage, who giggled obliviously.

DCZDCZDCZ

"Cullen!"

The ten year old boy looked up from his book to see a six year old girl with silver hair coming racing into the library, grass stains all over her robes.

"I didn't know you were visiting today!" she said excitedly.

"Father didn't tell me," he said. "I don't think the Knight-Commander told him either though, or I'd be at the Chantry right now. Where have you been? You're covered in grass."

"I got to play outside today!" she said with a grin.

"Are you sure you weren't supposed to be getting herbs?"

"_There_ you are!" the voice of the same mage who'd held the young girl six years ago echoed through the library a second before she appeared around the corner. "You're going to drive Irving mad with all this running about! Maker knows why he took you on…" she sighed and took the young mage's hand. "Come on now, you're supposed to be getting herbs."

"Told you so." The boy said with a laugh.

Zaira turned and stuck her tongue out at him, but laughed too. She waved goodbye, and was dragged off to her duties.

Just as Cullen was getting back into his book, another two sets of footsteps sounded, this time with the added metallic clank of armor. The boy looked up to see his father and the Knight-Commander walking towards him. His father had an expression of great pride on his face.

"Cullen," he said "It's been decided. You're joining the templars."

The young boy's eyes widened. "I-I am? But I'm only ten!"

"And?" the Knight-Commander asked "Many boys began their templar training before your age. In fact, if you want to be any good at this, you're going to have a lot to catch up on."

"I…yes, sir."

"He's got promise."

"Thank you, sir."

Cullen closed the book on the table and stood to face his future.

DCZDCZDCZ

Four years later, Cullen again stood in the Circle tower, watching the mages as a temporary replacement for a templar who'd fallen sick. _Most boys your age wouldn't get this chance,_ the Knight-Commander had told him. _So don't screw it up._

Despite his obligation to stay cold and uncaring, Cullen's head was about five times larger in pride.

A pair of quick footsteps came racing down the corridor, and Cullen turned to see a familiar, if not welcome, face.

The same young mage he'd known since her first day here was flying down the hallway, a huge pile of books balanced precariously in her arms. Cullen repressed a sigh. He didn't have time for the bothersome ten year old right now.

So focused was Zaira on her rush to get to her destination, she noticed neither the soon to be templar or the fact that the many books in her arms were falling.

"Careful-!" Cullen tried to warn her, but by the time he had, both she and the spell books were strewn across the floor. Zaira muttered a curse under her breath.

"Now where did you learn that kind of language?" Cullen asked as he walked over to help her.

The young mage looked up in surprise. "Cullen!" she exclaimed with a smile. "Why didn't you tell me you were here?"

He merely shrugged, helping her off the floor. She thanked him and brushed off her robes before bending to get her books. "Seriously though, don't let Irving hear you using that kind of talk. Maker knows what kind of punishment you'll get for that."

She rolled her eyes. "Please, he shouldn't be surprised considering the words Greagoir chooses to use when he comes barreling in, yelling about this or that."

Normally, Cullen would have laughed and agreed with her. But having been allowed the privilege of watching the mages at his young age, he felt sort of protective of the templars. Besides, he was older than her, what right did she have to take that kind of tone with him?

"Don't you dare speak of the Knight-Commander like that! He only does what he must to keep you mages in line."

Shocked, Zaira straightened and stared at him. "…You're joking, right? You're always the first to complain about how ridiculous Greagoir is-"

"Silence, mage."

Her narrowed on him. "Since when did my name become 'mage'? I'm a person Cullen, not a monster!" She spun on her heel and walked briskly away.

Instantly feeling bad Cullen called after her. "Wait, I…"

She cast a glance back at him over her shoulder, and he was surprised to see tears in her eyes. Turning away again, she said "I thought you were different from them."

She left him standing there, feeling about five times smaller than he actually was.

DCZDCZDCZ

Cullen entered the tower again, this time as a full fledged templar. He'd already stood watch over the mages many times, due to his "excellent work" from the first time. He'd told no one of his encounter with Zaira that day. But all in all, nothing much was different, except that this would now be daily.

He walked in as proud as he had been four years ago, though this time being sure to keep his arrogance in check. He didn't want to offend anyone again, mage or not.

After about two hours of standing watching nothing but a dark hallway, Cullen began to wonder why he'd insisted on working the tower.

And, right on cue, a sixteen year old mage came barreling around the corner, in a rush as always. She came skidding to a stop when she saw him this time, however.

"Hi," she said in a breathless voice, brushing hair out of her eyes in an irritated sort of matter. "When'd you get here?"

"A few hours ago," he answered with a greeting smile. "Why are you in such a rush?"

Her cheeks flushed a bit. "I ah…I…was just going to see Irving, and I thought I'd stop by and see you. Jowan told me you were here."

Cullen's mood soured a bit at the mention of the younger mage. He'd never liked the boy. Though he really wasn't sure why.

"…Isn't Irving's office on the other side of the tower?" he asked, puzzled.

"Oh, uh…Heh, I guess it is." Her cheeks turned a bit darker, and he wondered if she was getting sick or something.

"Are you feeling well? You're kind of red."

"Am I?" she asked quickly, touching her face. "Oh. I ah…my thoughts are rather distracted is all."

He raised an eyebrow. "And that makes you turn red?"  
"Well, um…you see there's someone I'm…interested in." she cast her eyes downward, a shy smile on her face. "He's a bit older than me, so it's kind of embarrassing."

"Ooh," he responded. He tried to smile and was surprised when he had to force it. "Well, I wouldn't worry about it, though you might want to wait a bit first. You're going to grow up to be quite a pretty woman, so I'm sure you won't have any problems."

Her eyes snapped to his, but instead of seeing the happiness he'd expected at his compliment she seemed…annoyed?

"Would you stop treating me like a child?" she snapped, and walked away in a huff. He blinked after her in surprise.

_What did I do?_

"Zaira!" he called out, and she turned back to him, irritation still clear on her face. After a moment he said "I'll try to get my post moved closer to Irving's office so you can see me without having to run."

She didn't react at first, but then Cullen could see she was fighting to keep the annoyed appearance. She gave up quickly and smiled.

"Thank you, Cullen."

DCZDCZDCZ

Cullen was going crazy.

Surely he had to be. He couldn't get his thoughts to focus – well not focused where they _should_ be. Ever since he'd convinced the Knight-Commander to move his post, he hadn't been able to get her out of his head. He was sure he could have easily handled it if he just didn't see her so much!

_Every. Day._ It was torture.

Moving his post was the biggest mistake he'd ever made. He'd seen her every day for the past two years, and as he'd predicted on his first day here as a templar, she'd grown into a beautiful woman. She'd matured out of her mood swings and flighty attitude, and had turned out to be intelligent, humorous…

And _maddening._

Yep. He was going crazy.

Cullen sighed, glad there was no one in the corridor to witness his pitiful demeanor.

And, with her usual impeccable timing, Zaira floated out the door from the library, for once not carrying a number of them in her arms. Lately she seemed to live and breathe the words written in them.

Repressing a groan, Cullen tried to ignore her, hoping she'd just walk right by. He could _not_ afford to be so distracted by a mage.

But his hope was futile of course. She saw him every day, quite pleased with his location and oblivious to the raging emotions spinning through his mind. She approached him with a soft smile, calm and blissfully unaware.

"Good morning, Cullen." She said cheerfully. "You're doing well, I hope?"

"O-Of course," he responded, silently cursing his stutter. "Not much has happened that could make it bad."

She laughed, and Cullen noticed that this too was different from before. Her laugh had once matched the other girls', bright and high – pitched, but now had a throaty quality he wouldn't have expected from her.

He took a very slow breath.

"What are you doing up here?" he asked, trying to distract himself.

"I came to see you of course."

That didn't help at all. "I meant what you were doing in the library. You don't have books like usual."

"Oh. That." A sour look came over her face. "That woman won't let me take books out anymore. She says I keep them too long." She sighed dramatically. "It's not like anyone else reads the ones I do. They hardly ever get checked out. But to answer your question, I was reading about Ferelden." Cullen raised a curious eyebrow and she shrugged. "I like learning about the land outside the tower. I hope I can go see it sometime when I'm finally a mage. But for now, I'll just stick to reading." She cast a glare back at the library. "Though it would be much more enjoyable somewhere else."

Unable to help himself, Cullen laughed. She wasn't a mean person – seeing her glare like that was amusing. "Once you've gone through your Harrowing I'm sure you'll be able to ask for leave. You're highly respected here – I doubt Irving or the Knight-Commander will mind."

"I don't know," she muttered. "Greagoir's never liked me. You know that."

"True, but he trusts Irving, and the First Enchanter trusts you."

She smiled at that thought, making Cullen have to take another deep breath. This wasn't working.

"Don't you have class right now? Not that I'm trying to rush you off, but…"

Well, actually he was trying to rush her off. But she didn't need to know that.

"Yes, I was just about to say goodbye. I'll see you later, then."

He muttered some type of agreement, wishing there was a way out of it. If he saw much more of her, he was definitely going to go mad.

"Zaira!" they both turned to see Jowan walking down the corridor towards her. She gave him a broad smile, waved to Cullen, and joined him by their classroom door. Jowan was speaking to her in hushed, excited tones, and after a minute of that she gave one of those happy little squealing sounds girls always seem to make and said something quietly back. She walked into class shortly afterwards, Jowan following after her. But not without a quick cold glance at Cullen, which he returned with a hard stare.

Cullen's abhorrence of the young apprentice must have rubbed off on him.

Left to wonder what they'd been so excited about, Cullen leaned back against the wall, relaxing a little. He really couldn't believe this. Infatuation with a mage was something no templar could allow himself. If anyone found out, he was dead. If only he was someone else, had chosen his own path instead of becoming a templar like his late father. He'd still have known Zaira, surely he could have seen her somehow. Then this wouldn't be so –

He paused, suddenly realizing something.

…He didn't _have_ to be a templar forever. No one was forcing him.

That was it. It would take a while but…he could leave the order. He'd have to make sure he had something to live off of first, he couldn't leave with nothing, especially not with hope of her coming with him. She'd said she would love to leave the tower, surely this was basically the same thing? Relationships between regular citizens and mages were rare, but not unheard of, and certainly not illegal in any way. All he would have to do is make it through a few years, save what he could, and then everything would be perfect.

…Well, assuming she would have him that is.

His brow furrowed. He'd never thought of that. In fact, now that he did, hadn't she mentioned being interested in someone a few years ago? Did she like him still? And he'd told her to wait even!

But she was older now, and as far as he knew, she had no relationship with anyone.

And come to think of it, while she'd said the person she was interested in was older than her, there was no mage within a acceptable age difference in the tower that wasn't female. Actually, the only man around that was older and anywhere near her age was…him.

He smiled slowly as it dawned on him. _That_ was why she'd been so flustered that day.

Well, it seemed he had nothing to worry about then.

He stood at his post, grinning at absolutely nothing and planning.

DCZDCZDCZ

Cullen watched them leave on the boat through his window with an emotionless expression.

She'd left without saying goodbye.

She'd gone with that mage – that _blood_ mage – and hadn't told him a thing.

And she'd just left.

After two years of planning, of preparing, of waiting, she'd just left with that Grey Warden like it was nothing. He should have told her how he felt sooner, should have told her what he was doing, should have…

No. No, it was that blood mage's fault. He'd persuaded her into this ridiculous plan for escape, and gotten her caught. If he hadn't forced her, she'd still be here, or maybe she would have escaped on her own, and Cullen could have found her later…

_Mages,_ he thought, turning away from the window. _Mages ruin everything. Destroy everything they touch._

_She destroyed my life._


End file.
